Having an unassisted birth

It is a big decision to have a birth at home without the presence of a birth professional. Certainly the commonly used term ‘unassisted birth’ is not the best. This implies that you are not only making a decision to give birth without a professional, but also all by yourself or that no one is there to assist you.

Actually, if you birth entirely on your own you have to assist yourself and your baby to be born. When your husband, partner, friends, relatives and children are present they will assist you. However, the term currently used is ‘unassisted birth’. Let’s coin another phrase.

Birth is the ultimate in physiological processes probably because it’s so infrequent and involves two people (mother and baby). Other naturally occurring physiological processes such as hunger, sexual drive, menstrual cycle, getting sick or going to the toilet don’t involve a second person to the level of letting a baby out of your body.

Birth in any place at any time can be the most physically intense experience of a woman’s life. All over the world women are giving birth in the exact same way, one contraction following another. This will occur whether the woman is surrounded by loved ones in a safe environment or in the middle of a famine, war or tsunami.

Planning an ‘unassisted birth’ is a personal statement although it’s often perceived as a political statement.

It’s also often perceived as a rejection of something but in reality, it’s a choice for something. Sometimes that might be having a cigarette after birth when that would be discouraged. Sometimes it’s for the intimate privacy or the distance from hospital or lack of midwifery care.

Regardless of all these factors, one of the very best things you can do for yourself, baby and those who will assist you is to learn birth and coaching skills. Before you react to the word ‘coach’ let’s think about that role. A support person is there to give you support but little guidance. Coaching is not telling you what to do, it’s a person who can give both support and guidance as you need it. It does not matter what term you use as long as people know how to help you if and when you need some help.

Helping you during an ‘unassisted birth’ can be breathing, whereby you use Directed Breathing, helping you relax inside your body using The Pelvic Clock or helping you to relax using Deep Touch Relaxation.

Learning birth and coaching skills based on our human body can change the birth experience from something that happens to us into a conscious experience between the mother and baby as they work together.

Using Common Knowledge birth skills can increase the satisfaction of your ‘unassisted birth’. There is another reason to learn good birth and coaching skills. There are some times when it becomes important to seek medical care during a birth. When you have birth skills you can move into a medical environment still using these skills. This means you are much less likely to feel that your ‘unassisted birth’ has failed. Instead you recognise a need to have medical care yet continue to work with your baby’s efforts to be born.

However, where you have your baby may be important. Being able to work with the process of birth wherever you birth, or with whom, become much less important to the memories you’ll live with than to what you have been able to do for yourself. Using birth skills throughout labour and delivery is probably the most significant thing you can do for yourself and baby.

You will never regret being a skilled birthing woman or having your loved ones work with you. This is the true intimacy of childbirth and building your family’s intimacy.

If you want to know more about Directed Breathing, the Pelvic Clock or Deep Touch Relaxation, Kate’s Cat, Hip Lift and Sacral Manoeuvre then visit http://www.birthingbetter.com.

Learn more about The Pink Kit Method For Birthing Better®, the only childbirth preparation course that focuses entirely on birth skills for mothers and fathers for ALL births.